Tips for Talking to Children – Emotions and Healing

When my son has a physical manifestation of some sort, be it a sore thumb, leg cramp, stomachache, headache or even fever. The first thing I do is talk to him so that he gets a chance to express his emotions or upset about things in his life that may be causing the physical issue.  The physical discomfort often miraculously resolves once the underlying issue is addressed. Here are some ways that I have found useful when doing this with my children:

1. Talking 

When your child has a physical discomfort of some sort, talk to them about what has been happening in their life lately.  Try to trace back to the time that the physical manifestation to reveal an event, situation or conversation that might have been the trigger for this physical manifestation.

2. Connecting 

Connect with your child on an intuitive level and ask yourself the question “what might have happened to cause this physical manifestation?” For myself, I find that images or a knowing often comes into my awareness. When I ask my son or daughter whether that was the particular incident or issue that is bothering them, it often would be. For my own son, underlying triggers can range from an incident in school such as a friend accidently pushing my son down, absorbing someone else’s energy such as anger or how I treated him, especially if I lose my patience with him. If you are unable to help your child reveal the underlying issue or if they don’t want to talk about it, the tip below is very effective.

3. Listening to Their Body 

Ask them to listen to their body. After talking to my children a little bit, I always ask them to listen to what their body is saying, for example, if my son had leg cramps, I would ask him to listen to his leg and ask what it wants to say. Sometimes, he may respond by saying he doesn’t know or can’t hear but have patience and wait a few moments and ask the question again. Encourage them by telling them that their body always knows and it’s their body so they can always hear. This method works every time and my son is able to pinpoint and tell me exactly what bothers him. This method has resulted in an immediate disappearing of the symptoms once my son expresses the issue that’s bothering him.

4. Conversing with a stuffed animal

Most of the time, younger children have not learned how to express their emotions or frustrations in words yet, especially when it comes to their own. A useful method to help your child talk is to bring out their favourite stuffed animal and ask your child, what does ‘sheep, sheep’ want to say? Is there anything that is bothering sheep sheep? I have found that this way sometimes, it makes it easier for my children to express what is upsetting them through a projection onto their favourite stuffed toy.

5. Emotion Release Exercises

Once you’ve helped you child identify an issue or emotion that is bothering them, it is useful to do some activities with them to help release and address the particular concern. Most of the time, talking to them and telling them that you understand and will help them is sufficient. But I have found that with anger, it is helpful to do some activities that will help your child release any stored anger they are still holding onto. Children are just like adults, although emotions pass through them quickly and they tend to not hold onto them, it still happens.

To read the emotion release exercises with your child, please refer to my article Emotional Release Activities With Your Child.


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  1. […] Read more about emotions and healing in my article about Children Mirroring Our Lives and Tips for Talking to Children for Emotions and Healing. […]

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